sexuality

Woman’s Pain

MTM blog March 2023

Womans Pain - pink clit
pink c l i t

Many clients and friends have come to me or asked for help about lack of interest or waning interest in making love and having sex. Either personally or for their partner. For example:

  • I am not sexually attracted to my partner now, and I used to be.
  • I don’t want to have sex with him.
  • Now that we’ve had kids, I’m not interested in sex.
  • It hurts to have sexual intercourse.
  • I feel insecure and unconfident about my sexual skills.
  • I’ve lost my libido and I don’t know where to find it!
  • It’s uncomfortable to make love.
  • I am not happy with my body image, size, shape etc.
  • My wife lost interest in sex when we had children, but I still need sexual release. (men
  • I have never had an orgasm and I want to have one (women.

I believe a lot of these issues start from a woman or a man’s first sexual experience. A woman’s pain is often a very deep wound.

Girls and romance

Many movies are romantic with kissing and tenderness and girls and teenagers are wooed with these ideas – where male lovers are romantic and gentle and treat women with love and respect and ask for consent.  They believe that these movies are real.

Boys and porn

Boys and men watch or read porn, where all women are wet, horny, ready and willing to do any act that a man can ask for. And men are always large, hard and able to have sex for hours and hours. They get the idea that these movies are real

Sex Ed

Most sexual education does not prepare women or men for their first sexual encounter. A teenage male does not look at photos of yonis and clitoris* (see photo above), to know that the sizes and shapes are different. He often does not know that a woman’s arousal takes a lot longer than his. He doesn’t know about women’s sensitive spots and erogenous zones, where to find them and how to stimulate them. And that women are different and have different reactions on different days and times. They often desire a slow, sensual lingering body stroking and teasing sensations. Sometimes they want it hot hard and fast!

Hymen

Teenage females (and males) are often not told about the hymen. The hymen is that little thin piece of skin which covers the external opening of the yoni. It will be broken the first time a woman has intercourse, which often results in bleeding and is always painful, physically and emotionally.

Even the word hymen, which is Latin, is the same in many languages and does not seem to be feminized in any way.

Virgins

So, for her first time, she is expecting a loving romantic gentle uplifting experience, and her fantasies are shattered by pain and blood. He is expecting an excited, wet easy and quick experience (just like masturbation) and as a result he can get performance anxiety!

Neither one knows what they are doing, and each is extremely disappointed.

Emotional trauma, shame and guilt, can result, especially if adolescents are not educated about these things. There is often emotional scarring and sex can often be associated with pain and trauma for the rest of her life.

So the next time, she is tense and fearful of pain, so she doesn’t relax. He is tentative and unsure, not wanting to hurt her either.

The woman cannot relax enough to enjoy making love with her male partner and sees it as an onerous duty.

Alternatives

Open communication and education is the key. Her mother, older sibling or peers can sometimes be helpful here. Books and the internet can be helpful or misleading information sources.

Conversely, if your first sexual experience is planned, consensual, and deliberately, gently and lovingly experienced, you can be more relaxed and open to orgasms.

I have included a photo of the whole clitoris*, as it is only the sensitive tip that is visible outside a woman’s body. Yes, it does look similar to external masculine genitals. The invisible bulbs are shown here as engorged when a woman is fully aroused. Being under a woman’s skin makes it difficult for both her and her partner to know what is going on. Verbal consent and communication is paramount for your mutual satisfaction and pleasure.

Other cultures

In some cultures, an older relative teaches the young person of the same or other gender. For example, an uncle teaches a young woman about sexuality and gender differences or an auntie or close female friend teaches the young man. Sometimes these liaisons (organized and condoned by parents) include the first penetration as well.

Sacred initiation ceremonies at puberty used to include instruction about sexual and spiritual matters by priests and priestesses or elders. These have been lost in modern times.

Orgasms

In life and sex men tend to focus on performance – their own or their partners. When they can let go of the big peak ejaculation, learn how to control their own desires and focus on creating the woman’s pleasure first, then they can have prolonged enjoyment. This makes more pleasure for both.

When women can learn to tune into their own feminine energy and learn how to have their own orgasms, without relying on their male partner, and also how to pleasure them, they can relax more easily and connect deeper.

There are many different types of orgasms – energy orgasms, nipple orgasms, clitoral orgasms, G spot orgasms. Even food orgasms!

Learning to Love Yourself

The key to overcoming these issues is learning how to love yourself, tuning in to your own sexual energy, tuning in to your body’s pleasure, and getting “out of your head”! This can take years or moments, therapy or discussion, confession or disclosure, everyone has a different path.

I can teach you body awareness with Tantric practices using breathwork and massage.

Interesting Fact: Many other mammals also have hymens for example, chimpanzees, horses, llamas, elephants, and whales. (Wikipedia)

If you have any questions or want to learn how to control your orgasm and ejaculation, pleasure your partner more, or have multiple orgasms,

ask Ally.

Shiva Shakti Love Ritual

Shiva Shakti Love Ritual for Couples

Here are some steps for couples to connect at a deep level, and to practice

  1. Both man and woman meditate separately on their love and connection. Share positive feelings to each other, one at a time.
  2. Share who or what you dedicate your orgasms to eg each other, or healing.
  3. Eye gazing with devotion for a couple of minutes in silence
  4. Breathing together: one starts breathing out loud on the exhale, the other follows to synchronize their energies.
  5. Lovers kisses, sharing breath and energy. Circular breathing – one breathes in as the other breathes out.
  6. The man holds the space in masculine presence. He sits down in a comfortable chair with no arms.  His shiva lingam is strong and erect. If not, he energizes it.
  7. The woman dances around him with her shakti energy, fully present in her full feminine energy.
  8. She sits astride him, on his thighs, genitals touching, and they rock together. He gets stronger and harder and she gets juicier
  9. She lowers herself, sitting on top of him, and slowly, inch by delicious inch, becomes fulfilled.
  10. He holds her hips and moves her up and down slowly or quickly, teasing or thrusting. Kisses abound to connect. Caresses enhance their connection

Her juices overflow and run down his balls. Her ankles cross to hold him firmly.
And her orgasmic screams echo his moans of pleasure.
She rides the waves of ecstasy, he is the rudder in her strong sea.
Then he slows, to ride his waves and controls his orgasm
to ride his own peaks and valleys,
hanging on to the edge and skimming
backwards and forwards across the edge.
They ride the waves of ecstasy for hours.

She leans back and puts her legs up.
Then she perches on top of his thighs.
He lies back and she rides his pommel until he begs her to stop.

They sit together softly kissing,
and the wave rises again.

They connect the stars and the planets

and expand into the oneness.

beyond words

beyond  description

There is unity of one body

There is no body

floating sensation

Connection

Bliss

and love.

Enjoy your Shiva Shakti Love Ritual practice!

Ally

Shiva Shakti Love Ritual for Couples yab yum
ecstacy

Ally in Aldinga 2022

Calling women in Aldinga and the southern areas of Adelaide!
Are you interested in finding out about sacred sexuality and Tantra,
tuning in to your feminine energy, and learning how to pamper, pleasure and love yourself more?

Ally Thomas 2022
Ally Thomas

I will be available at Here’s to Strength, a new wellness hub in Aldinga from Wednesday 17 August 2022 on Wednesdays from 10am to 7pm and Saturday afternoons.
On Wednesdays fortnightly I will be available for AccuTouch (acupressure and Reiki) healings for men and women; and Sensual Tantra massages for women only.
On Saturdays in August October and December 2022 I will be facilitating my Sacred Feminine Playshops:

Sacred Feminine Playshops in Aldinga

  • On Saturday 20 August from 2-4pm, come along to an Introduction to Tantra and Sacred Feminine Playshop – women only
    To educate and empower women about sacred sexuality, and help heal shame, guilt and fear with sensuality and love. Open your heart to love and radiance. Tune in to your feminine essence. Connect your mind body & spirit. 4 keys of Tantra. Meditation, dance, movement $30 each
    Tickets #1 (also on 8 October and 3 December)
  • On Saturday 17 September I will present Sacred Feminine Moon Magic Playshop – women only from 2-4pm.
    Tuning in to moon cycles. Connect your head, heart and yoni.
    Womb meditation and healing $30 each
    Tickets #2 (also on 15 October and 10 December)
  • Saturday 1 October I will lead the 3 hour Spiritual Energy Awegasm Playshop for women only
    Use breath for grounding, moving energy, unblock your chakras. Energising & healing. You can turn on or turn up your feminine energy!
    Learn how to have an Awegasm without touching yourself!!
    BYO yoga mat or towel to lie on. Maximum 10 ladies for this Playshop only. 2-5pm. $50 each
    More details HERE
    Tickets #3 (also on 22 October and 17 December)
  • All Sacred Feminine Playshops include meditation, dance, movement and lots of inter-active fun!
  • Please note that all Tantra exercises and massages at Here’s To Strength are non-sexual, energetic, connecting experiences.
  • Events are fully clothed. Any touch is with full consent
  • ALL 3 PLAYSHOPS paid in full $100 – Bookings HERE. More details and tickets HERE

Services in Aldinga from Wednesday 17 August 2022 fortnightly

  • Sex Education Q&A Wednesdays fortnightly 12-1pm – free (17/8/22 and 31/8/22) men and women welcome. Ask your questions about Tantra, sacred sexuality and learn what you didn’t learn in SexEd classes at school!!
  • Full body Tantra massage for women only – $100 for 1 hour session for August (usually $160) Wed 17/8 and 31/8/22. Book HERE
  • Tantra Pleasure Experience is like a massage – very gentle, very relaxing and also energising, with guided visualisation, breathing and Tantra techniques. Women can learn how to enhance your feminine energy and how to move it around your body to relax and enjoy more pleasure. You can clear blocks from past abuse, fears, hurts and other pains that stop you from enjoying your life fully, and balance your chakras so that your energy flows smoothly.
  • Choose from
    • Sensual Massage (relaxing, pampering massage) 1 hour $100 August only (usually $130)
    • Tantra Massage (can include external yoni massage) 1 hour $100 August only(usually $160)
    • Chakra Balancing Massage 1 hour $100 August only (usually $160). There is more information HERE.
  • AccuTouch Healing – for women or men. One-one sessions which include Acupressure, Reiki and NLP modalities to relax and heal mental, emotional, physical and spiritual issues in a non-confronting way with gentle touch (clothed) $90 for August per session (usually about 90 min $150 1st session and 60min $100 2nd session). Paid in advance: 3 x sessions $255, 4 sessions $480. More information HERE.
  • Transformational Relationship Coaching and Counselling
    Using non-confronting NLP (Neurological Linguistic Programming) processes and techniques, I can help you with relationship issues – lack of confidence, trust issues, emotional release, addictions, ED or PE … These NLP techniques can help men or women who wish to get over a relationship trauma, learn to love again, and have more romance and a more fulfilling sex life. For men, women, couples.
    – $100 per hour session August only (usually $200 per hour) Wed 17/8 and 31/8/22. More information HERE
  • Sacred Feminine Art – Wednesday 31 August from 11am-12noon.
    learn how to draw a woman’s face in 5 minutes (one hour group session) paper and pencils provided $10 per person. It’s easy and fun! no experience needed. For all people of all ages…
    Bookings phone Heres to Strength
    Tickets HERE:
  • Please note that all Tantra exercises and massages at Here’s To Strength are non-sexual, energetic, connecting experiences.
  • Events are fully clothed. Any touch is with full consent

Products Available in Aldinga

  1. What Men and Women Really Want – 6 Tantric Love Secrets” paperback book $20
  2. Pampering Packs $20 and $50

So, book in now, for a massage, healing or Playshop with me, call me or book with Here’s to Strength

Ally Thomas 0419 038 310

also on Facebook, Linked in & Instagram

http://www.herestostrength.com

1A Old Coach Road Aldinga SA 5173

9am-9pm 7 days a week

phone (08) 7561 3500

#tantra #sacredsexuality #tantramassage #acupressure #sacredfeminine #relationshipcoaching #massageadelaide

Change

Change

“If you don’t like something, change it.
If you can’t change it,
change the way you think about it.”
Mary Engelbreit

I am My Lover - cover for Change
Change your Lover by loving your self more
  • How is your life?
  • Are you happy?
  • Are you doing what you are passionate about?
  • How do you pleasure your self?
  • Do you love your true love?

Change your Happiness

Happiness is a state of mind. Yes it can be inspired by a person, or word, an action, a sight. It’s still an internal thing, a personal thing.

If you’re feeling sad or unhappy, just feel that. Really FEEL that feeling. For just one minute. Then change your feelings by thinking of something or someone who makes you feel very happy and joyful. For example, sadness of the loss of a friend or family member can be felt briefly and then changed into a happy memory of that person or a shared moment with them.

Passion

Are you passionate about your job or vocation? If you are, that’s great! Celebrate!
If not, find a creative hobby that you love: for example, art or dancing or photography. It can give you something to look forward to at the end of the day, once a week or on the weekend. And it’s a good way to meet people and make new friends too.

True Love

To search for your true love, start with yourself. How would you like to be loved?
What would you like someone to say to you to express their love? Is it words of love or compliments? Flirting cheeky banter? Dirty talk? Sweet romantic poetry? How do you talk to your self? Change your self-talk to sexy words of affection.
Would you like to receive gifts? For example, flowers or cards or kisses? Buy your self some flowers and say enigmatically to your friends “they’re from a secret admirer!”

New Relationships

Are you scared of meeting a new person or starting a new relationship because your last partner hurt you? That new friend or lover is probably just as frightened. So make lots of new friends and have fun with them.

Remember to change your belief to “My next partner will be even better than the last one” and “Our relationship will be better than my wildest dreams”.

Eventually you can change your expectations, thoughts and beliefs to make these things happen.

Of course there will be some ups and downs, some self growth and some fun experiences on the way.

Self Pleasure

How do you pleasure yourself? Here are some examples:

Some people get pleasure from the feeling of wearing special new clothes, and the compliments of their friends.

The tingly bubbly taste of champagne, or a rich red wine; a creamy cold icecream on a steamy hot day; or a spicy hot chili dish can turn you on, one way or another.

Smelling his after-shave or her perfume or a spicy incense or lavender candle can get other people going.

How do you pamper yourself when you want to feel special? 

You can read a special sexy romantic book, look at sexy pictures, imagine your favourite lover (real or not) making love to you.

Shut your eyes and try caressing yourself with a feather, or a tissue. Gently stroke sweet-smelling body cream or oil on your legs, your arms, your whole body.

Whisper sweet words of love that you always wanted your lover to say to you…

Run your fingers through your hair slowly and sensuously.

(I have to go now, and continue this myself…)

Change the way you think and feel to change your life to one you love.

Ally AcuTouch Change 2022
Change with Ally, your Transformational Relationship Consultant

 

When you want to transform or change your life, your love life, your sex life, contact Ally to talk about your first steps…

Books by Joani Blank

New Book Products

I met Joani Blank at a Love Intimacy Sexuality Workshop in 2008, and stayed with her in her co-housing in Oakland. She inspired me to bring her to Sydney, Australia to run some sexuality workshops in 2009.

Joani Blank’s “Down There” Down Under Tour 2009

  • “Eve’s Secrets Revealed: all about Female Sexuality” (for men only) Mon 16 November 
  • “How to Get what you want in Bed (or wherever else you do It)” Tues 17 November
  • “It’s not a Secret any More: all about Women’s Sexuality” (for women only) Wed 18 November
  • Sex over 50 or 60 or 70  Thursday 19 November

Joani also held private sessions 1-1 with locals.

Her wisdom, sense of humour and fun made these workshops inspiring and enjoyable as well as educational for the participants!

Joani’s Achievements

Joani Blank founded Good Vibrations, the first woman-centered sex toy shop in USA in 1977.

Joani Blank
Joani Blank at Oakland Wharf in 2008

She also…

  • Founded “Down There Press” in 1975
  • Wrote and/or edited nine books.
  • Produced and directed two videos
  • Invented the Butterfly Vibrator and Titattoos (now Intimate Art Tattoos)
  • Trained and worked at the Sex Counseling Unit at The University of California, San Francisco (UCSF)
  • Was a volunteer counsellor at San Francisco Sex Information working at the switchboard every Friday evening for the first several years of its existence.
  • Taught sexuality courses in the Evening College at Skyline College in San Bruno, CA
  • Served on the Board of Directors of the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS), publisher of the Journal of Sex Research.
  • Facilitated numerous sexuality workshops. She was always very interested in many aspects of sexuality: understanding eroticism, self-sexuality / masturbation, polyamory, and sexuality education for adults.
  • A Human Awareness Institute graduate and HAI Team Member.

Sex educator and advocate Joani Blank MA MPH, was the founder of Good Vibrations in San Francisco. She promoted sex-positivity for over 30 years. She was the author or editor of several sexual self-awareness books, including:

  • Femalia a beautiful book with thirty-two full-color photographs of women’s genitals reflect the diversity of women’s bodies. Therapists, sex educators, women’s health clinicians — and all women — will find this volume a welcome addition to their libraries. Photography by Michael Rosen, Jill Posener, Tee Corinne, Michael Perry, and Joani Blank. Unfortunately it is Out of Print.
  • Good Vibrations: The New Complete Guide to Vibrators;  
  • Still Doing it (women and men over 60 write about their sexuality);
  • First Person Sexual;
  • I Am My Lover: Women Pleasure Themselves (photographs)

Down There Press started in 1975 with the publication of her Playbook for Women about Sex and for many years was a part of Open Enterprises/Good Vibrations. It was sold to another publisher in 2007. None of the books that Joani wrote or edited are being kept in print by the new publisher, not even the three that sold tens of thousands in their lifetimes.

In 1992, Joani converted Good Vibrations and Down There Press into a worker cooperative. At the time, there were fourteen owners (including Joani in my new status as an equal owner). The company continued as a cooperative growing to 100 worker-owners until early in 2006. At that time the current owners, more than 70 of them, voted to abandon the cooperative ownership structure in favor of a more conventional corporate structure so that Good Vibrations could attract an outside investor.

The Playbook for Women about Sex by Joani Blank

This is a sexual self awareness book for every woman.
When you have filled out those sections which interest you, you can

  • hide the book
  • share it with a partner or friend
  • throw it away or
  • make it public.

You may enjoy going through the book again after a time to see if how you have changed.

Completing the exercises in this innovative playbook will help you become more aware of your attitudes, sexual history, body image, partner choices, what turns you on and communication patterns. by understanding your own feelings better, you’ll be better able to communicate with your partner and feel more comfortable with your own sexuality.
Limited paperback copies are available. The PDF is approved for release by Ally Thomas. Authorised by Joani Blank 2009.

The Playbook for Men about Sex by Joani Blank

This is a sexual self awareness book for every man.
When you have filled out those sections which interest you, you can

  • hide the book
  • share it with a partner or friend
  • throw it away or
  • make it public.

You may enjoy going through the book again after a time to see if how you have changed.

How come a woman wrote this book? Well, the Playbook for Women about Sex needed a companion piece and no man had written it yet. All the technical advisors, reviewers and editors of this book were men, and Joani was appreciative of their encouragement, support, and suggestions.

Limited paperback copies are available. The PDF is approved for release by Ally Thomas. Authorised by Joani Blank 2009.

A Kid’s First Book about Sex
by Joani Blank

And

The Playbook for Kids about Sex by Joani Blank

‘Kid’s First Book about Sex’ and the ‘Playbook for Kids About Sex’ (for somewhat older children) were written many years ago when Joani Blank’s daughter, now an adult with kids of her own, was a little girl. Both books are out of print and because Joani wants them to be readily available, she has made both of them available for FREE download HERE

You are welcome to print out these books for your own use, but please do not make multiple print copies for sale.

Still doing it (women and men over 60 write about their sexuality) by Joani Blank

Can’t think about your parents or your grandparents having sex? What about when you reach that golden age? A recent survey conducted by Modern Maturity and AARP found that more than 25 percent of Americans over the age of 75 indulge in sexual activity at least weekly.

Sexual pioneer Joani Blank has her ear on the pillow of sexual America, and the secret is coming out about sexual pleasure over age 60! Pulling the covers off, Blank has collected anecdotal evidence supporting these dry if tantalizing statistics. Nearly 40 women and men over the age of 60 share their stories of their partnered and solo sex; their gay, straight and bisexual experiences redefine our images of what it means to age sexually.

Still doing it expands our vision of sexuality beyond youth, deepening our understanding of how we grow sexually. These intimate accounts give all of us permission to seek lifelong sexual pleasure that can continue and get better indefinitely, and with infinite variety.

Editor Joani Blank founded Good Vibrations, the San Francisco-based sex toy, book and video store in 1977. Described as ‘unabashedly evangelical” by Playboy, she has dedicated her life to helping women and men find sexual pleasure.

I Am My Lover by Joani Blank

Six respected photographers present intimate portraits of 12 women practicing humanity’s first love – and last taboo. Over 100 thought provoking duotone and black and white photographs capture a powerful range of aspect and emotion additionally, the women photographed share with us their thoughts, recollections, fantasies, and feelings about their self-pleasuring.

Limited number of hardcover copies are available HERE

First Person Sexual by Joani Blank

Everyone does it – and hardly anyone talks about it!  More than 40 women and men describe their masturbation experiences in a series of vignettes and short stories.

These sexual progressives bare their souls, offering their tales of when and where they practice their solitary pleasure, what inspires them, and why and how they do it! They give new meaning to the term ‘digitize”, and reveal myriad new ways to pet the kitty or play in the one-man band. Read on, fuel your fantasies, and practice, practice, practice.

Pricing

Limited hard copies of some of Joani Blank’s books are available HERE.
Joani authorised me to copy and PDF the Playbooks for sale in 2009.

Name of Book Description price
Playbook for Women About Sex – PDF This is a sexual self awareness book for every woman. Invented and hand lettered by Joani Blank
This PDF is approved for release by Ally Thomas.  Authorised by Joani Blank 2009.
AU$19.00 PDF
The Playbook for Women about Sex – Hard Copy A sexual self awareness book for every woman
by Joani Blank
A4 paperback booklimited copies available
AU$29.00
Playbook for Men About Sex – PDF This is a sexual self awareness book for every man. This PDF is approved for release by Ally Thomas. Authorised by Joani Blank 2009. AU$19.00 PDF
Playbook for Kids About Sex – PDF For older children and teenagers words by Joani Blank
pictures by Marcia Quackenbush This PDF is approved for release by Ally Thomas. Authorised by Joani Blank 2009.
FREE
A Kids first book about sex – PDF For younger children by Joani Blank This PDF is approved for release by Ally Thomas. Authorised by Joani Blank 2009. FREE
I am My Lover – soft cover book Women Pleasure Themselves
edited by Joani Blank
Lambda Literary Award Finalist 1998
limited copies available
$55.00
First Person Sexual – paperback book Women and Men Write about Self-Pleasuring
Joani Blank; editor
Small Press Book Award Winner 1997
ORDER NOW

About Joani

More information about Joani Blank: http://www.joaniblank.com/personal.htm

Kids books: http://www.joaniblank.com/kidsbooks.htm

Unfortunately Joani died on 6 August 2016, aged 79.

Here are some articles about her life:

https://www.xbiz.com/news/210819/good-vibrations-founder-joani-blank-passes-away

and https://www.sfgate.com/local/article/Good-Vibrations-founder-Joani-Blank-feminist-dies-9130288.php

How much does a Tantra Massage cost?

How much does a Tantra Massage cost?

Cost to you for Sexual Dysfunction?

MEN: Do you have Premature Ejaculation?  Do you suffer from erection dysfunction? Have you had a  prostate operation? Are you dis-satisfied with your sex life? Do you have a lot of stress and tension in your work and life and don’t know how to get relief? Lack of sleep or broken sleep? Pain, lack of pleasure for you and your partner? Frustration? Lack of satisfaction for you and your lover? Performance anxiety?

What does this cost you in your life? Your relationship, happiness, joy, relaxation, control, pleasure, orgasms, performance…

Cost to do something?

Have you tried drugs, viagra, hormones, pumps, injections? Are you sick of debilitating side effects? Painful frustrating experiences? Tried to focus on something else? Been castigated for your efforts? Does it work for you?

Ancient Tantra Technique is easy to learn

A simple 3 step exercise takes about an hour for you to learn what to do, you practise doing it, and get an idea of how it works. For YOU! Very easy! The side effects are that you will feel relaxed and energised.

Then you practise – by yourself (it’s fun) until you feel competent. Then surprise your lover!!

She will be happy and grateful. You will be satisfied and relaxed. Confident in your masculinity and control of your sexuality.

Possible Benefitshappy couple mytantramassage

  • easy to learn and practice!
  • it works!
  • stronger erections
  • release tension
  • control ejaculation
  • multiple orgasms before or after ejaculation
  • increase masculinity and confidence
  • de-stress
  • full body orgasm
  • relaxation
  • sleep better.

How much does a Tantra Massage cost for Men?

It costs less than Viagra. It’s more healthy than drugs. Ad it works better than mental control.

For men, a one hour one-one discrete private confidential Tantra Massage session to heal any of these issues, is $250. Other sessions are available see Mens page

Available in Adelaide, Melbourne, Newcastle, Hobart Brisbane, Perth, Canberra, Launceston, Sydney – see my Schedule page. Book now HERE

How much does a Tantra Massage cost for Women?

For women with sexual abuse issues, who have been hurt either mentally, physically or emotionally, you can also have a confidential consultation and Tantra session to learn how to relax, tune into and enjoy your feminine energy, and how to have a (female) orgasm – or a pampering sensual soft massage. See Women’s page for more information.

Tried and tested by experienced Tantra Teacher

Tantric exercises are originally from ancient India (Tantra) and China (Taoism), have been controlled, hidden or lost for many years, and are now available to all.

Ally has studied and practiced Tantra for over 20 years. She has taught Tantra techniques experientially since 2009 to thousands of men of all ages, occupations and health in Australia and New Zealand.

Any testimonials?

Ally has received many grateful testimonials from men who have learnt this technique and expressed how happy they and their wives, lovers and girlfriends as a result.

Hi Ally, I just want to let you know I had a very deep sleep last night, which doesn’t happen very often, and I’m sure yesterday’s wonderful, exhilarating session with you was the reason. Thanks again for a new experience. I will be visiting you again. K

You have helped me bring back my confidence in myself 🙂 🙂 I will practice control.
J Adelaide

I was amazed at how long I was able to control my ejaculation using the tantra techniques. B Melbourne

Thank you for removing my block for my sexuality. i feel the power of my masculinity without the bravado! J Perth

I came to see you in desperation yet in one visit you successfully convinced me that there was nothing wrong with me. You have marvellous hands! Thank you for your ministrations! D Brisbane

I recommend Ally to make you feel wonderful. I came in as a 60 year old and left as a 17 year old!  B Brisbane.

book now my tantra massage

Poem – Swingers Addicted to Sex

SYDNEY SWINGERS ADDICTED TO SEX

He told me he was horny
and loves to pleasure women
hear the sounds of love
linked in a group of men.

Exploring the couples swingers club
reviewing potential matches
late one December night
we fantasised which one was right.

Then downstairs to get naked
join gods and goddesses in the spa
we chatted and teased each other
and 6 got out to explore “aaaah!”

We watched her give him head
suspended on a special swing
but hands and tongues were wandering
turned on by that sexy thing…

The bed was raised inside 3 walls
the walls had big wide slits
Voyeurs could watch us writhing and moaning
invisible, excited and thrilled to bits!

“We don’t need those men”
she whispered in my ear
so we kissed and thrilled each other
turning each other on–“ooh, ooh, ooh, my dear!”

Back to the tub to refresh
bodies to relax and wash
start stroking again, caught kisses
exploring fingers and tongues–“my gosh!”

We went to the room at the end
with mattresses covering the floor
a group was joined by others
and an orgy of 10 was explored.

Couples joined in 3s and 4s
all exploring mouths, pusses and cocks
teasing and licking and fucking
sharing pleasure without keys and locks.

And finally the swingers night was over
our passions and energy spent
we wondered where the night went
and recalled each exciting event…

Voyeurs and exhibitionists were stimulated
in all senses and many ways teased
we both had fun with each other
and ended up satisfied and well pleased!!

swingers bodies

Tantra Practice Playshop in Brisbane

Tantra practice playshop

Come along to a Tantra Practice Playshops in Brisbane

7pm-11pm

$70 for couple, $50 for men, $30 for women* (includes Supper)

FAQs – see below

Testimonials for TPP – below

  • Connect, learn and practise tantric techniques and exercises in safe space
  • Give and receive touch safely – without agenda, with boundaries
  • Have fun, make connections with like minded people
  • For singles, friends and couples

We endeavour to have each Tantra Practice Playshop gender balanced, so if you bring a friend of the opposite sex, you are more likely to be accepted, as sometimes there is a Waiting List. Couples can be friends to maintain the gender balance.

Playshops are held monthly on Saturdays in Adelaide, and in other cities by request as available. Ally will be in Brisbane on 12 December 2018, so this Playshop is specially available then. She has previously organised Playshops in Brisbane on 31 August 2017 and 31 August 2018.

You do not have to have Tantric experience, just be open minded and willing to learn.

  • Expand your tantric knowledge and Tantra practice
  • Have fun doing Tantra exercises with different people
  • Practise how to move your sexual energy through your body
  • Learn how to connect with your self (spiritual), your body, and others
  • How to create and improve intimacy
  • Easily learn about how to set boundaries
  • Enjoy safe loving consensual touch
  • Expand your spiritual energy with sensual awareness

This Playshop is for open-minded men women and couples to learn and practise tantra and other sacred sexuality practices and have fun in a safe sacred space that’s playful gentle healing and respectful.
All exercises are safe, with consensual touch and CLOTHED.
You will be guided through some of the following: tantric exercises, meditation, body work, touch, energy movement, breath, dancing, massage

There is no nudity, no alcohol; no drugs and no sex intercourse involved.

** Delicious healthy Supper, juices and soft drinks provided (let us know if you have any dietary needs).

BOOKINGS ESSENTIAL, preferably to Ally, as numbers are limited

BOOK HERE with your contact details – email with Tantra Practice Playshop in Subject Line

TESTIMONIALS:

Last night was just perfect. Thank you Ally (Adelaide 2017)

We enjoyed last night very much. (couple Adelaide 2017)

Hi Ally,
I just wanted to thank you for inviting me you your recent tantra night (2014). What an amazing evening!
Being a first timer, I wasn’t too sure what to expect, however, the positive energy and inner happiness I felt from doing the various exercises and sharing each moment was unbelievable.
Such a lovely group of people to spend an evening with and a great supper too!!!
Thanks ally, see you soon,
Namaste, K Adelaide

Blessings Ally.
I cannot thank you enough for the beautiful space which was created last night (March 2013) and the safety and energy in which it was provided and given to us as a group. I was deeply enriched by the experience and when I sent forth the energy, sent it home in the direction of my husband. When I returned late in the evening, He desired me so fully that the love making which followed was energetic and encapsulating. It coursed through us like a river of magic through our spiritual beings. Heaven found herself in our arms and we were blessed with her presence.
Thank you for taking a chance with having me along (when you knew little of me) and I look forward to spending more evenings with yourself and others, in the sacred provision of life shared, explored and discovered.
Namaste. D Adelaide

“Hi Ally. I’d like to thank you again for the opportunity and lovely night (March 2013), it was incredible. You and Peter created a warm, safe and loving space where I actually felt more free, cared for and able to express myself in ways that would generally make me feel quite anxious. The other guests were all beautiful people and added to this environment, making it a wonderful night. I’ve never felt so connected to another individual in such a short space of time, it was a very positive and uplifting experience. During the night I felt my confidence increase, which has continued, and I feel things can only improve over time. I certainly learnt a lot, not just about tantra, a little overwhelming to be honest.
Again thank you, you’ve been an excellent guide. Looking forward to the next one. J (Adelaide)”

“I’d like to say thank you for being a wonderful facilitator/group leader Ally – you’re a highly skilled, professional Tantra Woman & you held the group beautifully. You created a safe space for people to relax into the practices. Gold Star to Ally!
The whole experience was so uplifting, lately I have been stressed out!
I thought all the people there were exceptional – beautiful with positive energies! Yeah it was a great night and one to remember !
When’s the next one ?” (Adelaide)

FAQ

Are the men clean, honest, quality, respectful, safe, friendly and normal?

Yes. I have personally checked every ‘single man’ who attends the Tantra Playshops in Adelaide. The pre-requisite is for men to have had at least one Tantra Pleasure Experience or Tantra session with me. They may be a bit shy, under confident or over confident though…
In Brisbane they have been recommended by Marilyn…

Will the women be positive, pleasant, open and friendly?

Yes they are personally vetted by me and open minded and friendly. However they may be a bit worried about feeling safe, and that their boundaries are respected.

The Couples who attend – are they safe, sharing, open and friendly?

In Adelaide, Couples are required to complete a Questionnaire and some have had sessions with me.

Do you have to join in with everything?

You can choose whether you do an exercise or not. You can set boundaries so that you are safe

What limits or boundaries are available?

You set your own boundaries and limits.
eg touching only on exposed skin. Touching arms face head is OK etc.  Touch must be light and gentle. Please massage my shoulders firmly. Please don’t touch my head/hair! Please don’t touch my breasts. You can touch and stroke my lower arms and hands.

Is everyone married or in a relationship or single and available?

Some people have partners, and are here with them, some are not. Agreements are made between partners about limits and boundaries for each other.
Singles aren’t necessarily looking for a relationship. The Tantra Playshops are not about pairing people up, it’s about practicing Tantra with a partner, which may or may not be yours.
At the beginning of the party everyone tells the whole group their status, boundaries and agreements.

Will there be more men than women at the Tantra Practice Playshop?

No. Every party we endeavour to have gender balanced with equal numbers of men and women. You can choose to be with a woman or man in some of the exercises.

Do I have to take my clothes off?

Some people may take some of their clothes off because they get hot, however full nudity is not involved. You choose your level of comfort and clothing. You need to be OK with others partial nakedness, however no more than you see on any beach in summer!

What are the ages of people attend a Tantra Practice Playshop?

All age groups are welcome, and each Playshop has different attendees, however most people are between 30 and 50.

Contact Ally to book your place

email or book or to go on mailing list for these Playshops and other Events.

tantra practice playshops

Tantric Actions for better Sex

Five Tantric Actions for Better Sex

Why Tantric Sex?

  • To connect
  • To create intimacy
  • To turn on
  • To stimulate
  • To control.

    2. Conscious Breathing to create intimacy

  • Ask your partner to breath out and make a sound – a moan or aaah….
  • Breathe with them and harmonise your breathing. One person may be slower or faster than the other at the beginning.
  • Do this for about 2 minutes
  • When you harmonise you can hear it
  • Swap over and your partner follows your breathing

    2. Eye Gazing to connect

  • Sit together, facing each other, without talking and look in each others eyes for about 5 minutes
  • Feel the love in your heart for your lover
  • Breathe together, decide who will follow and who will lead

    3. Physically turn yourself on

  • As you breathe in, do your Kegels (squeeze your Pelvic Floor or PC muscles)
  • Release as you breathe out
  • Do this for about 5 minutes separately, then do it together
  • To get your energy and juices flowing

    4. Leather and Lace circle – to stimulate

  • Breathe together, sitting holding hands, eyes open or closed
  • HE gives his “leather” (male energy) – breathing up from his genitals to her heart down to her genitals across to yours
  • SHE gives her “lace” – (female energy) – from your heart to his heart and down to his genitals, across to her genitals and up to her heart.
  • This is good to do in yab yum – sitting with legs out or bent and genitals touching
  • rocking back and forwards – very stimulating and a great way to start making love

5. Control your energy

  • Continue conscious breathing together
  • When lingam* is inside yoni**, keep the energy flowing in a circle…

    5 Tantric Actions for Better Sex - myTantraMassage.com.au
    yab yum couple

* lingam = penis                        ** yoni = vagina

  • Stop when necessary to keep control, or change position.
  • Enjoy!

 For more ideas on how to use Tantra and simple practical Tantric techniques to enhance your sex life, see my book “What Men and Women Really Want – 6 Tantric Love Secrets” available now in paperback. Order here.

5 Tantric Actions for Better Sex - myTantraMassage.com.au

Tantric Sex Coach

What does a Tantric Sex Coach do? First of all, what is Tantra? What is Tantric Sex? Why do you need a Coach?

Everyone loves sex, but how do we learn about it? if you are lucky you learn from an older partner, or a more experienced lover. Most people learn from their peers, as teenagers, using the “trial and error” method.

Some people want to improve their sex life. Many men want to learn control so they can last longer and pleasure their lover longer.

A lot of women don’t know how to “turn themselves on” sexually – how to tune in to their feminine sexual energy or how to really enjoy making love  with their partner.

Tantra

Tantra comes from ancient India. Taoist teachings from ancient China are similar to Tantra. The word Tantra means to expand and weave. That’s what you learn to do – expand your sexual energy and weave it around your body and between you and your partner.

Tantric Sex

Tantric Sex is that close connection you have that can lead to out-of-body ecstatic orgasmic sex and pleasure that seems to last for ever. It can take you to other places, other spaces, and an expanded sense of beingness. Many people have tried to explain it, but the experience is beyond words, beyond description. You know that you have been “out there” or “in there” or “away somewhere” because you feel yourself “coming back”!

How do you create that connection? How can you do that, step by step, whenever you want? Tantric techniques are the answer. Breathing, moving, and consciously being present with your self and your partner, are some of the keys.

Tantric Sex Coach

A Tantric Sex Coach guides and teaches you (and your partner) Tantric exercises so that you can get to those heights. Men can learn to control their orgasm and ejaculation so they can have multiple orgasms. Women can learn how to get in touch with their sexual energy and enhance it to relax and enjoy more pleasure making love.

Coaching in intimacy and sexuality is more than teaching you how to have mind-blowing sex! It’s more about Sex Ed – education about your sex organs, how your sexual energy works, and about what YOU like best. It’s about loving yourself, self pleasuring, learning new strokes for your partner, and much more…

It’s breathing together to create closer intimacy and connection. Tantra can be very healing on many levels.

So what are you waiting for? Book your session with Ally, Tantric Sex Coach, today to enhance your sex life, ignite your passion and have more joy and blissful pleasure.

Tantric Sex Coach Ally Thomas Adelaide